Saturday, May 10, 2008


I never thought this blog would become what it has become. It is a place where my heart runs freely. Everything I have written comes from there, and I am glad. Everything I have written means much to me. I want my words to be actions again.

Seven months ago, my heart was broken. A vital part of me died then.

But. In the words of poker player Amir Vahidi, in order to live, you have to die.

Seven months ago, I died. Because of that, I live fully now.

I got something I never intended. I gave something I never intended.

I cry as I write these words. They are powerful to me.

I sacrificed my heart back then. I thrive with that stronger heart now. My heart was strong before it was broken. But that strength pales in comparison to what is there now. I can't go backward, though it is asked of me. Just like you, I can't betray my heart. I can't scorn its strength now. There lies incredible strength, beauty, feeling, spirit that I will allow to flow freely inside and outside of me. I won't turn my back on me, just as you won't turn your back on you.

There is no bitterness, no sadness, no anger in my words, my feelings. My words are just present.


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