Wednesday, May 7, 2008


All of this writing I am doing will settle down in a while. For now, it will flow out.
My writing is a tangible manifestation of what I have inside of me. To look at me right now, you can't see what burst inside of me.
Unless you read my words.
I've said many times what I lack: a great, loving relationship with a great, loving woman. My writing is my way of saying what I want, and what I can do. It feels a little selfish to write so much about me. Ultimately, I hope I'm not doing that. I am writing for someone. I am writing for someone's heart, soul, spirit. Because I can't feed them tangibly, phyiscally. What I write, I want to do. My writing is nourishment. That nourishment is who I am.
It's a little hard to feel this way every day, with knowing what I lack. But I have joy, too. Joy in understanding what I possess and what I can give. As I give of myself, I am open to receive. And what if I don't receive? I am still ready to give. It's that whole less/more argument. I'm not turning my back on someone to whom I give if I don't receive. Especially you. There is passion in my giving, yes, but there is something even more important present--compassion for you.
So the star will keep bursting. When you look up at the sky tonight, those stars you seen have light that's been shining for millenia.
It's the example I follow.

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