Deny thyself

That seems to have been my motto, my modus operandi, for awhile. I always seem to sacrifice and give up something now, either because I don't feel like I deserve it, or there's an impeding sense of worse to come, or I'm not in a position to reap the rewards. It's a tough cycle, and whenever I think I can get out of the hole, a hairy arm reaches up to pull me back. When, I wonder, can I hack that arm, and be free, physically and psychically?